The Moment My World Stopped Spinning…
There has been many times in my life when my world has stopped spinning. I am only twenty-four years old and my life has been very difficult. When it comes to the things I have been through in my life, I am always very skeptical to talk about them because I am worried people will judge me. From having muscular dystrophy to having a drug addict father, I am worried someone will judge me and those that are around me and that mean the most to me.
Behind the blogger is something that I started to participate in a while back because it does help when I am able to “vent” and talk about different things and my readers can learn a little more about me. This time around the behind the blogger writing prompt is “the moment my world stopped spinning”. Well, I am going to talk about something that happened only a short time ago – August 20th, 2015.
Let me just put it out there that I will never have children because of the muscular dystrophy and well, to be frank; I do not really like kids. Anyways, August 20th – the moment my world stopped spinning, again. It is a date that will forever be stuck in my head. It was the day I had to put my beloved ten-year-old Snowshoe Siamese, Mya, to sleep.
Some of you may have followed along on my Instagram or my pet Instagram and knew what was going on with her prior to her passing. For those that have no clue what happened… I will explain. A few months prior to her passing, Mya started having problems with her left eye. It started getting really red and looking like it was bloodshot, eventually it started clouding over. We brought her to the vet and she was diagnosed with uveitis in her eye. Uveitis is inflammation of the uveal tract (colored part of the eye). We started with eye drops, which did not seem to help and if anything, to me it seemed as if it made it worse for her. During the eye drop treatment, a fluid pocket formed and settled on the eye, eventually hardening. Went to the vets again after two weeks, received pills to treat infection/inflammation from the inside, and told to continue the drops. The eye clouded over completely, she had already lost sight in the eye, and the eye started to bulge out of the socket. We finished the medication and then called our vet, again. By now (November 2015), they know our names, what we look like, our phone numbers and our pets and barely have to look at our files. It was probably one of the worst phone calls we had to make… but, our vet finally said the dreaded words, her eye needed to be removed. It was hard to deal with, heartbreaking and sad… however; we did it and moved on. She came out of the surgery great, was doing amazing and didn’t really seem to be bothered by the loss of her eye. Hell, she probably felt so much better now that she didn’t have all the pressure.
We went a little over a month and then things took a turn for the worse. Mya stopped using the
bathroom, she would pee, but that was it. Then she stopped eating. We offered up so many things that she liked – human food and cat food. She would take a bite, then back up, and have this awful look on her face. We started the whole vet process over again and brought here there. She was given fluids under the skin and we were given an enema to use if we had to. She did not get better, so we did the enema. I love(d) Mya to the end of the world, but she was not the easiest cat to handle. Her life started out horrific, so she was not very trusting. She did not enjoy being picked up or touched unless she initiated it. So, you can imagine how it went trying to do an enema on a cat like that. We blocked her in the bathroom, it was a struggle, and there were many screams from Mya and many scratches. She probably did not even get half of it. However, she did use the bathroom… a little. At some point, she started licking the gel from the enema because that is what cats do. Immediately she started throwing up… though there was nothing to throw up. The next day she ate some, but then threw it up shortly after. My mother called the vet again and we brought her in that afternoon. She never came back home.
On the way to the vet’s, I knew what was going to happen. I knew Mya would never come home. I knew we were going to have to put her to sleep. See every time we go to the vets, it NEVER failed, there was always someone parked next to us that was bringing their pet in to be put to sleep. When they say things happen in ‘threes’, I believe it, because that is how things work in my family. Our vet barely started doing the examination and I could tell by the look on his face that things were not good. He sucked in a breath and started to say it was liver disease and it was a late stage. The moment he said that, I lost it. I almost walked out of the exam room, almost got in the car, and stayed there. But, I did not, for Mya’s sake. We were given our options – we could go through treatment with her or well, y’know… the other option. The vet stepped out and let us talk and I broke down even further and just kept saying, “I don’t want her to suffer, I don’t want her to suffer”. I know it broke my mother’s heart and I know it was tough for Mya, as she hated the vets and was so terrified. We made the decision to have her put to sleep and to have a private cremation done. When they put cats to sleep in our vet’s office, they do it in their back room, where their surgery area is. It is quieter and no one bothers you back there. Mya’s passing was quick. The minute they told us her heart had stopped was the moment my world stopped spinning. Leaving without Mya that day was probably one of the hardest things I have ever had to do when it comes to my pets. Like I said, I will never have children due to a medical condition but also because I have no interest, so my pets are like my babies, even if Mya was called ‘sister’ and my dog is sometimes called ‘brother’. I spoil them rotten and buy them presents and goodies all the time.
Mya was cremated and finally came home a few days later. A few days after that, our vet sent a very touching and yet heartbreaking card with Mya’s last footprint, along with a poem and a note from the vet and vet-tech. The moment my world stopped spinning was the day that I lost Mya. She was a cat that I could find comfort and love in when I had a bad day. I love her and miss her more than I can even describe. I would give anything to have her back in my life.
Thank you for reading a story from #BehindTheBlogger Hop. Every 2 weeks a group of bloggers is given a writing prompt. These prompts are very open ended, so our bloggers can write about whatever they desire. The main rule is that their blog post directly relates to the topic of that week. The point of this hop is for our readers to get to know us on a personal level.
Please hop along and read all of the blog posts in this weeks hop. Just click the links below. If you want real and raw emotion, then you will find it here. After you read each post, please comment and share. We want to get to know you too!